Thursday, May 28, 2009

How to make every man want you (or not as the case maybe)

No I haven’t just gone mad. That sounds like my personal idea of hell at the moment. My head and heart would question my sanity and yell at me for a long time. No this is a book by Marie Forleo called ‘Make every man want you’ that one of Ruth’s friends had sitting on the side at dinner the other night and I have since been reading. My immediate thought was Ms Forleo should write a part 2 called ‘How to recognise and avoid the arseholes that you attract having made every man want you’ because we don’t want every man. We just want that one that will make us happy.

The book isn’t of course about making every man want you though, but about uncovering personal glow or as she calls it ‘irresistibility’ and being comfortable in that. Knowing you are worth it in short. Personal glow was something I used to have in abundance. My nickname is ‘Gloworm’ for goodness sake. Recently though the trust in the Glow, especially the power of it, has been tested. I am not so much hiding my light under a bushel at the moment as burying it beneath a mountain.

The techniques Ms Forleo offers are neither rocket science or new. But the way she tells it makes it fresh to my current way of thinking and returns me to what I already knew to be true, but had temporarily forgotten. Whether I am ready to hear it however remains to be seen.

I was thinking about this in the spa today. Auckland’s temperatures were plummeting and I went for a swim and a warm-up in the sauna and steam room. I was sitting in the empty steam room thinking about the book and about whether I want to make men want me, let alone everyone and whether it’s about trusting that you have glow on the inside and letting it shine on the outside and that you are really are a glorious, beautiful, wonderful woman if you just accept and trust and know it. I was thinking about this as I stepped into the fog of the room that prevented me from seeing more than a foot in front of my face (which is hampered even more by my short sight that is of the level that if Gordon Ramsey were to stand in front of me I would say his skin looked like silk). I was thinking about this as the beans and broccoli I had for lunch made their presence known in my stomach and I was thinking about this when their presence converted to loud, uncontrollable, fabric and bum skin flapping fart. Fortunately it was smell free.

I was still thinking about this when the men I hadn’t seen at the rear of the steam room got up and walked out. I emptied the room. Of men. The irony wasn’t lost on me. It seems my body doesn’t want to make any man want me just yet.

I told Dale, my Aussie mate that I am staying with, this story and he said,

‘I take it this wasn’t in Australia?’


‘Well because in Australia the guys would have gone ‘WA-HAY! Good on ya girl!’

To get a date here in Australia it seems I must brew up some crowd-clearing/pleasing beauties. Having Glow it seems isn’t enough because Glow is only a foot in the door. After that there are extra culturally specific things to take in to consideration. Like eating lots and lots and lots of beans in Australia.


  1. Maybe not 'good on ya' but it would raise a chuckle instead of immediate vacation of the room.

    Take a more scientific approach (you know I don't subscribe to much of the spiritual mumbo-jumbo you are so fond of) and read 'How To Catch Him and Keep Him'. No, I haven't read it, but being based on psychological principles and research, being written by an affilliate of David D'Angelo, I have more confidence in it's success.

  2. So you want me to read a book written by a PUA or endorsed by a PUA (Pick Up Artist to the uninitiated). How is a PUA going to know what is going on in a woman's mind when all he has done is spend time studying how to shag her, aye. Aussie twaddle matey. Raspberries.

    And I did start my whole journey doing science. I studied psychology at uni. I then realised that before this bubba of a subject that is still in nappies came along and it's big brother (the empirical method) that is also barely a century old there were thousands of years of philosophy and spirituality that all the sages of the world were basing their teachings on.

    Science is the arrogant adolescent at times

    Philosophy is the benevolent parent

    And tut tut, you are recommending a book you haven't even read yet.....

    PS I get to be this upfront with Dale because he is a good mate and because whilst I couch surf with him he farts for Australia in just about every room in the house and does so incredibly proudly, almost rating each one for efficacy.

    PPS Dale read 'How everyone has an opinion' post.

  3. Haha a well-read PUA (psychology, evolutionary psychology, biology, evolutionary biology, genetics, romance) (no I'm definitely not a "well-read PUA") probably knows more about what is going on in a woman's subconscious mind than she does (waiting for the flames...).

    Philosophy is about thinking and reasoning - no facts required. Useful yes, fun yes. Science is about facts and proof beyond reasonable doubt. Indispensable. (haha arrogant)